Hello readers. I'm going to write. I'm hoping it will help me from the thoughts that think I'm better off dead. Because I am so lonely. I am missing so much life.
Most especially life while my son grows into a man. And I'm so sad. Yet I'm producing so much art. I'm blessed. That I am. Yet it is taking over my life too. No one is buying my work any longer. No one calls. I got rid of my Facebook friends because what were they any way? I just don't know.
I fell so hard in love. It was no fantasy. It was real. It was Earth shattering. And it forced me to do things I would never dreamed of being capable of before. And it took me to a place I never thought I would remember. It took me to utter bliss. It took me back to God. So how could that be wrong? And so I stay true. Even though I want to die a lot of days from the heart ache.
I remember so many strange things in my breakdown. Things from long ago times. Are they real?? They seem so. Yet I don't
know. People left me because I changed. So fine. Go. I am really going to keep trying. I got this far, didn't I Arg?